The beginning

Dum de dum...Here comes my blog. Figure this is the best way to write my impressions of my trip. I can come back to it and anyone who is interested can read it. So why have I come to Iran, and why am I planning on staying for awhile? To improve my Farsi, I can speak, make myself understood and chat about a variety of topics, but not perfectly. Far from it. I realised if I didn't come, then my Farsi would stay as it is, which isn't good enough for me. Without language there will always be distance between me and Iran. Ok, so language, that is my main goal. But I've also come to see what it is like being a young woman here. I've come every 4 years, always with my dad and my sister, for 2 weeks or little more. Constantly surrounded by family it is impossible to get a minute on my own- except in the shower. I've never been left to my own devices to navigate everyday life in this Islamic Republic, so I've come now, alone, to work out how that is done. I've also come to spend some real time with my family. I'm always amazed that although we only ever come for 2 or so weeks every few years, you can walk into a room filled with people and feel full of love for them, even though I debate how well I really know them. My relationship with this country and with my family has always been navigated through my dad, but it is time to explore my own relationships here. If he has fallen out with one of his 8 brothers or sisters it doesn't mean I can't see them does it? I hope to learn to cook from my Aunties, so I can go home and make a big Persian feast for friends and family. I hope to understand a bit more about Iran, and how I fit here, and once I return to Britain how my Iranianess fits with me. A British mother and an Iranian father, and never lived in Iran so I can't be really, truly Iranian can I? It isn't a mathematical equation of course, although my dad tells me I have 75% of his genes (it is true that I don't look any different here), and only 25% of my mothers English ones. If so, then do I understand 75% of this culture? Do I feel 75% Iranian? We shall see. I guess that explains why I've called myself Kebab & Two Veg- the Iranian national dish combined with a perfectly British one. I should have gone for something about a flower with no water or a bird trapped in a cage, something very poetic and emotional.. but instead I've chosen something vaguely amusing- guess that is my
%25 English genes.

The things I will write here are my impressions of what I see around me. It's not that these are the first time I have had these thoughts, just the first time I've written them down. I find so many people here filled with paranoia and have debated how honest I can be in the things I write, but as a friend in London reminded me the government does have bigger fish to fry! So I will be as truthful as I can, this is simply a record of my trip and the thoughts I've had, nothing outwardly political or untoward- think I'll be ok..

My first few days in Tehran have been lots of fun. On entrance to the new Imam Khomeini airport all seems bright, modern and relaxed. Only gets truly Iranian in the completely disorderly queue to put your suitcases through the x-ray machine when all the chadori women push in and I have to fight to keep my place in the line. First few days spent getting to know the area around the apartment and how to get around. Queue for 30 minutes to buy piping hot bread- and that is at the least busy time of day.
I'd forgotten quite how big, dirty and busy Tehran is. Taxis only take you to certain points so to get from down town back to the house I took 3. I was sent out to buy Gata (or Qata?) an Armenian bread that is sweet and round, but my dad says I've got the wrong thing but then tucks in quite happily. After inspecting the local shops I realise I didn't need to bring 60+ tampons with me as I can buy them right here! Sure they must be very expensive, but I remember when I needed some a few years ago and we had to drive to a pharmacy on the edge of town where they sold them in ones! In the local bookshop I have the option of buying a variety of English titles including: Mozart: A Life in Letters, Young European Designers or The Bean Diet.

I head out alone one evening to meet some friends for dinner. I try to get out of the cab but can't as my seat belt is still fastened-oops. I then try again but my headscarf has somehow got completely entangled in the seat belt, so take a good few minutes to unravel it. Cabbie is very sweet and patient and thank god no one else in the cab. So still need to work out quite how to manage my hijab, although I am very happy I have brought a long black shapeless dress with me as I can wear this under my coat so when I go out to dinner I can take my coat off (it is so uncomfortable trying to eat in a thick over coat) and still be %100 Islamic Republic friendly- wahey! Tandis is a shrine to north Tehran's neuveaux riche. Full of designer clothes (still can't work out what is real and what is fake), customers in tight clothes (men and women) and fake noses (men and women). Dinner in the Blue Duck, a trendy, all you can eat restaurant, is great because of all the people to watch. All the woman are so chic I wish I'd brought another pair of skinny jeans with me and debate other dress/ jean combos I could get away with wearing in public but I remind myself I haven't really come here to test what type of dress is acceptable- my freedom is safe at home in London, so I should probably just obey the rules. I am shocked to see women in knee high boots and skirts- with some leg showing! How do they get away with it? I guess if you go from house to car to restaurant you aren't really out on the streets to get picked up by the basiji. I do wonder how easy it is to get lulled into a false sense of security though, if you are able to get away with this and that do you just think that is the norm and then get a big shock when you get in to trouble for having wine in your car or too much hair coming out of your headscarf? Or is the getting into trouble just something else that you get used to?

My time in Tehran is full of small victories as I manage to get onto blocked websites and buy air freshener by asking for a spray (e-spray in Persian English) that gives good smell.
I also eat pepperoni pizza (not the real stuff but tastes a lot like it). I'm looking forward to getting to Isfahan, seeing the family, cuddling my granny and starting Farsi classes. I do wonder though if with all the family around if I will manage to do much on my own, which is what I am here for.